Check out my phone

IMG_2668

Note the date: April 3, 2013. This thing is legit.

Behold!

I’m the only person I know with a flip phone.

People feel sorry for me for owning it. I don’t just suspect that; I’ve actually heard comments.

What people don’t know is that Bell Mobility has been texting me for about two years, telling me I should get an upgrade already. Heck, they’ll even buy me a new phone. At this point, I think I’m embarrassing them.

Here’s why I still have it:

  1. It still works. And it should. I mean, it’s only 5 years old.
  2. It’s the type of phone that people don’t expect you to be attached to, which is great because no one assumes I’m accessible 24/7.
  3. I like knowing that I won’t have cardiac arrest if I drop it or lose it.
  4. A while ago, I made the decision not to upgrade just because I can or just because a new model has come out. Even if it’s free. Because of waste. Because of mining conditions in developing countries (see: Conflict Minerals). Because I don’t need it right now. Because I don’t want to become a rude person who checks her smartphone constantly.

I will admit that as more people comment on my phone, I’m starting to feel more sorry for myself. It has gotten to the point where I don’t bring my phone out in front of clients, as not to embarrass the agency I work for. I’ll even cover the phone with my free hand while I’m texting on the train ride home.

Still, I find myself not wanting to give in. I shouldn’t have to feel ridiculous — which I do — about using my phone. But here we are. This is the society we live in. And we can’t be surprised that when we are hit over the head with the same messages thousands of times daily, they start affecting us. It’s a hard current to flow against. As someone who is constantly aware of advertising and mass consumption, I’m still finding difficult not to trade in this perfectly good phone, in light of what everyone else a) has, and b) infers about me because of my phone.

Swiffer thinks women are romantically involved with cleaning products

swiffer

Date me!

While we’re on the topic of advertising (after talking about Cascade), I would like to add Swiffer to my hitlist.

You’ve probably seen them, but here are the commercials I’m referring to:

In Swifferland, women love cleaning products so much that we not only appreciate them, use them frequently and rely on them to make our lives easier, but we have personal and even romantic relationships with them. When something (not someone) better comes along, we dump our old mops/brooms. And it’s on to the next one, ladies. But, don’t worry, we don’t have to feel bad about our exes; they’ll find other household objects to make up for what we offered them in our previous relationship. And we will move on with our new objects, satisfied with how they fulfill our emotional, intellectual and maybe even physical (ewww) needs.

Cascade thinks women can’t get along

From the Cascade website

From the Cascade website

Nothing boils my blood quite like advertising. Not saying it’s worse than domestic violence or unequal wages or rape culture or (globally speaking) lack of basic human rights, it’s just more noticeable to me.

On today’s hit list: Cascade commercials

In case you haven’t seen them, watch these:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0z8orrZv6ls

https://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=fvwp&v=T86X-41KYs4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ELzTksxsAQ

And for good measure:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujhVT2fDReo

This is what they’re telling me about women; this is the version of me that they’re trying to sell back to me:

  • Women should and do care a whole lot about sparkling dishes
  • No matter how hard they try, women just can’t get along with each other
  • Women are so competitive that the thought of another woman outperforming them in a domestic task is enough to drop the dish gloves
  • Dish-related conflict is so common that someone, a Kitchen Counsellor, could make a living talking crazy women off the ledge
  • Well-meaning men shouldn’t even try to help us, because women are so bitchy and crazy and clean

Hey Casade. Your advertising sucks. You’re sexist and condescending and old hat.