Big yellow taxi… almost killed me.

I was almost hit by a cab today.

I know that almost being hit and actually being hit by car are a lot different in their levels of interest. But as the ‘almost’ victim, I must say that it was the scariest thing I’ve experienced in a long time.

If nothing else, the near-death incident reminded me that (a) you simply cannot trust cabbies, and (b) humans have the most absurd perspectives.

Almost being eaten by a shark. Almost dying in a plane crash. Almost being trampled to death at a KISS concert. Almost falling from a 10-storey building. These scenarios are newsworthy. The person who survives gets a spot on TV, writes a book and has the best bar story around for decades. It’s these stories that stay with people and get into their imaginations. Some become weary of crowds, heights, open water etc.  Even though all scenarios could end in death, no one seems to be all that afraid of cars (and car accidents happen way more often).

I started thinking about the inequality because I was really shaken up after the fact. The car was literally six inches (if that) away from breaking my legs and running me right over. If I hadn’t jumped out of the way, I would be dictating this blog from Toronto Western hospital.

All I wanted was a little solace. This is what I got:

“Really? Yeah, you gotta watch those cabs.”    

I didn’t even see a montage of my life flashing before my eyes. I only saw yellow, as in the hood of the taxi. Even the grim reaper discriminates.

I could have died. DIED. In my mind, there is no difference between me and the guy who survives a shark attack. Death is death, people. It’s time to take it seriously. And you can start by giving me a book deal.


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